I needed to think. They kept saying: don´t think so much, it’s no good for you. I didn´t by it. I always had a feeling that there was a lot of things that should be thought all over again and a lot of things that couldn’t be said with words at all. I felt that many feelings were impossible to express with language. Visual arts could do that.

​

I felt colours, sounds, feelings inside my body, the things I could feel with my fingers and on my skin, light, especially nature all come together, connected. I used to make long walks in the forests by myself since I was four years old. Those are the sources still. There was always an urge to express myself.

​

I did like music, theatre, writing, dancing. But visual arts seemed to give a forum for all the interests and possibilities I had. I also had a problem with authorities and time management, on top of it I was simply strange and socially clumsy. Though one had to train and practice certain skills a lot, and I did because I really wanted to learn, visual arts still had kind of aura of freedom. That was calling me.

I have experimented a lot with different kinds of media. I have built installations that have included photographs, voices and videos. I have done performances and included theatrical and ritualistic elements in them. I have painted and in painting my main interest has been colour.

​

I often understand my themes only after I have produced and exhibited the work. It is one thing that makes making art so fascinating. I go after a hunch, a strong feeling in my guts; this is how it should be, this form captures the feeling I am after. Years may go and then one day I truly understand what it was all about. Sometimes this makes it very difficult to sell work to galleries for them to exhibit as I like to have an open mind when I work, so I don’t know what to tell them. I am also chronically scared of not fulfilling expectations. I wish they all would say :`just do what you feel like`.

Sometimes it puts me in a difficult position considering the audience, because I really do want people to get something out of my work, something truthful and worthy, something constructive and somehow beautiful. But to my surprise I have found out that people are very intelligent. If I do my work well and strong they sometimes understand before I do.

​

In my art there has been themes like relationship between man and woman, the gap between dreams and reality, fragility of childhood, and the changing female body. At the moment I am thinking about freedom and how much one actually can decide for oneself. I also think freedom as an essential nourishment for everything living. Only by sharing and making sure everyone has time enough to enjoy living as he chooses we can feel free. Of course one’s own freedom cannot be with the cost of others. The whole pattern brakes when people take advantage of each other. Time is the only true resource we have. Time, nature and each other.

​

Since my children were born 2000 and 2003, I was sucked to the world of mothering so strongly, that I nearly stopped working. For many years there has been no time ore space for artistic development. Now that space is back and I have started to work again. I mainly paint. With installations the process of making art is so different from painting. After the idea of an installation has become, it is like a project that has to be managed: getting a place, a funding, and lot of lists of what to do next. Painting is very direct, an ongoing discussion between the medium and the artist, the painting and the painter progressing and changing right before one’s eyes. Installations and performance might come again, at their time. But now I think making art has to be play, it has to feel good in my body.

​

I seek freedom, luxury of time, the dignity and humanity that comes from the possibility to listen to oneself, feelings, memories, dreams for the future. The luxury of time gives a possibility to act upon a childlike curiosity and experience the feelings of marvel and happiness. Through my work I seek the bits and pieces of good life for myself and others.

Making art, non-commercial art especially is critic of consumerism which seems to be the idea that penetrates all societies. I find consuming an attitude which rises out of mental and spiritual emptiness. Art would be a better religion, if a religion is needed. Anything to make people not search happiness from things. We all have our sores and sorrows, but artistic expression, spiritual sensitivity and soulfulness gives them form, meaning, and makes it a poem we can share.